Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Apple Addict


Today I saw an insipid Yellow Apple Core moaning, " I am going to die", flaked out at the side of the road.

No. It wasn't okay. It even had sickly orange ruts all over its person where someone or others teeth had been scraping at it. What are you supposed to do about it though ?

I'm no expert on apple cores or how to remedy them , which is terrible as I did feel enormously sorry for it. I didnt know where to begin helping it back to fullsome life. I mean, it was just sitting there with death written all over it in this eerie yellow ink.

But to tell you the truth, the real reason it worries me is that I am an Apple Addict and it brought me face to face with my own destructive behaviour.

This is why I am taking myself off to get Certified. Yes. I am going to put on a pair of cordeuroy trousers and a stripey jumper with sleeves that are much too long and then I shall lurch down the road and sign up. I'll keep my hands in my pockets and look to the bottom left all the way. It'll take ages to get there because I'll be struggling with my ravenous addiction and the fetid vision all the way.

Yes. After today I just cant go on with it. No. My conscience will be gnawing on itself until I get it Certified.

I might even wear a beanie when I go. Do you think that would make me look like a Struggling Apple Addict ?

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